The Secret Diaries of Bella Swan
by ForeverResa
Summary: Edward has left Bella so what does she do. She spends her days and night's writing in her Diary. This story is based on Journal Entry's Bella writes about her thoughts feelings, and life so I hope you like it and please review.
1. Entry 1

Entry # 1

Dear diary,

Edward has just left me. I feel broken and all alone. At night the pain seems worse. Non stop nightmares and screaming. I wake up from the most horrible dreams. Most replays of when Edward left me some just things I can't explain. Sometimes I wonder why Edward could love a girl like me. With pale skin,shallow,but yet mostly to herself. I never really beilived in fairy tales and happy endings,but when I met Edward thats when things changed.

_**Author's Note: The summary describes most of it but these entry's are based on her life, what she is feeling, what she is thinking, how her day goes from New Moon to Breaking Dawn. It might go back into Twilight a little bit if she decides to talk about things that she remembers. Some Entry's will be long and some will be short. I hope you enjoy and please review.**_


	2. Entry 2

Entry # 2

Dear diary,

Charlie is beginning to become worried about me. I have been screaming at night from the nightmares I wake up from, dreams of Edward and the way that he left me. The pain that causes my heart to feel like it's breaking into a million pieces. Some night's Charlie would come to my room to check on me to make sure that I was okay. I assured him that I was just fine and then he said okay and walked back into his room to go back to sleep. It's hard to sleep, especially when I had just started getting used to Edward sleeping by my sides at night. I would always leave the window open and at night after Charlie had gone to sleep and he would come in and lay with me as I sleep. For some reason in my mind I keep thinking that he will come back, but in the end my mind tells me he won't. I still leave the windows open at night just hoping and wishing that my wish for him to come back will be true.

_**Author's Note: So no one gets confused she's writing about her day. Some Entry's will be short and some will be longer. She mention things she feels or things that have happened over the past few days or weeks. I hope you enjoy this story and please review. Thank you.**_


	3. Entry 3

Entry # 3

Dear diary,

It's been days now. Edward hasn't returned and I'm not doing any better. My heart is still broken, aches from the pain and Charlie is still worrying. I sit alone in my room crying from the pain that is seeming to be haunting my soul. I feel as if he is still a piece of my heart. Something magical and deep within. I wait and wait as the days go by hoping for his return. Hoping, he will realize that he does love me. I don't believe it, I believe he lied to me, he does love me right? But if he lied, why? Why would he want to hurt me in such a cruel way? Why leave me so broken with wonder. I decided to email Alice today, to tell her about my troubles, but the messages never seem to send.

Dear Alice,

This isn't the first time that I have emailed you. It says that your address is invalid so I know you won't receive this, but if you did I would want to tell you how much I miss, Edward and you all. You were like family to me. You even told me so yourself. It's hard to believe that you have gone away now. I miss everything, Return?

I click to send them email as it resent it back to me saying there was an error. I closed it out with a sigh. I just wish something good would happen for once, something to cheer me up a little.

_**Author's Note: I hope you are enjoying the story so far. I would a appreciate if I could get some reviews to let me know how I have been doing. The story will base throughout New Moon to Breaking Dawn, This is my persepctive of it Bella was writing a Diary from New Moon through Breaking Dawn this is what she would say. Thanks for reading !**_


	4. Entry 4

Entry # 4

Dear Diary,

How do I live like this? Live with the pain of a broken heart. I feel like it tearing me apart from the inside out. Today I decided to go down to LaPush Beach where the Quileute's go cliff diving. I had never cliff dived in my life, but I didn't care at that point. My world was falling apart and I felt like there was nothing I could do it fix it. It's been a while now and he hasn't come back. I decided what did I have to live for? My mom and dad? I guess that would be all to say. II took off everything and jumped in. I remember hitting the water and seeing Edward coming up from the bottom. I tried to grab is hand as it slowly reached out towards me, but someone pulled me out of the water and Edward just faded away. That's when everything went black and I realized that everything was just an illusion, Edward was never there, just a figure of my imagination.

When I had awaked my best friend was there to save me, Jacob Black. The guy who I had made mud pies with on the beach as a kid. Who had told me the story about Vampires and how they were real. He was leaning over me in the sand as I slowly opened my eyes, looking at my surrounding. He cared for me enough to save me and that so much to me, but why? Why would he want to save the broken girl from drowning? The girl, who had put him to the side, forgot all about him when her world was starting to fall apart. Why did he seem to care so much?

He picked me up, drove me home in my truck and that's when my mind started to think. Is there hope for me to heal?

_**Author's Note: So this is the part in New Moon where Bella jumps of the clift. Well accoring to her thoughts after Jacob has saved her she starts to wonder is there hope for her to heal. Jacob knows what she has been going through and just when she thinks she has no one left he's there. Review! and thanks for reading.**_


	5. Entry 5

Entry # 5

Today I went to Jacob's house. I hadn't seen him in a few days since the day that I jumped off that cliff. Earlier as I was riding towards his house I found some red rusted motorcycles that looked like they could use a paint job. They were sitting on the outside of some ones lawn. I went to ask the man how much he would want for them, he said that I could have them for free since they wouldn't be worth much unless someone was to fix the engine and give it a good paint job. I told him I would take them anyways because I knew the perfect person for the job to fix them, my best friend, Jacob Black.

I rode over to Jacob's house to show him the bikes that I had picked up. He was surprised that me out of all people would bring him bikes, but he took fixing them up into consideration. I asked him if after he would finish them if he would teach me how to ride one and he said yes and that one would be mine and one would be his. He walked over to the back of my truck taking two hands and lifting up one of the bikes. I asked if he needed any help, but he said no. He got both of the bikes in the garage and I sat down while he handed me a soda. Then he started to look at the bikes to see what would need to be done. He said that he would need to go to the junky yard tomorrow to find some parts and I asked if I could come and he said sure with a smile on his face.

Tomorrow was going to be fun, not that looking for parts for a motorcycle at junkyard is fun, but just the fact that I get ton spend it with my best friend makes it worth the while.

_**Author's Note: I'm trying to base this on the book as much as I can, but somethings might be differn't. I hope you enjoyed, please review and check out my other story called The Secret Journal of Jacob Black.**_


	6. Entry 6

Entry # 6

Dear Diary,

Today Jacob and I went to the junkyard to find some parts for the motorcycles I picked up yesterday. Going to the junkyard was not something I had done before so I stood there in confusion not knowing what to look for since I didn't work on cars and motorcycles like Jacob. I walked around with him wearing some old jeans and a green hooded jacket. I was told not to wear my good clothes for walking in a junkyard would get me dirty from the Greece on the parts and the dirt on the ground. I watched as Jacob searched for the parts that we would need.

After he found all the parts I drove us in the truck back to his house. He got out some tools and began assembling the parts on one of the motorcycles. He told me that after the motorcycles were finished that he would get some red paint and paint them so they would look just like new.

That day I spent it in the garage with Jacob watching as he fixed up our motorcycles. Even though I didn't do much, but hand him tools when asked it was fun. It's been a great day with my best friend as I call him, Jake.

_**Author's Note: This entry was kind of hard for me to write given this wasn't in the actual book/movie, but I did my best. Please review. Thanks!**_


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